Stop the New Years resolutions madness and just...RESET!
January 1…the one day of the year when most people take even a few minutes to consider the results of the past year and think about some plans for the year to come. We love to ask the question “What are your new year’s resolutions?”. Most people will answer with at least one of these that top the lists…”Lose weight, volunteer to help others, get better balance in my life, get a better education, get a better job, save money, get fit, eat healthy, manage stress, take a vacation or trip.” Does this sound familiar to you?
Until a few years ago, I did exactly the same thing each January 1. As a high “J” in Myers-Briggs terms, I would spend time creating detailed goals and plans for achieving those goals. When I finished my detailed mind-map (by the way, this is a great approach I just to get my thoughts in order…check it out), I typically had no less than 15 goals I was confident I could achieve over the course of the next year, broken into quarterly objectives. The plan was set…motivation was high…and I was again perfectly positioned for the great disappointment of soon being overwhelmed, not meeting my plans, and giving up. This cycle had continued for years and I finally got to the point of asking myself these key questions…
1. Why am I keeping in this cycle of insanity where I’m doing the same thing over and over again but expecting a different result?
2. Why doesn’t this work for me…and why doesn’t it work for the vast majority of people who set new years resolutions on January 1?
3. What could I do different that would be better for me and put me on the path of living my purpose with passion and achieving success?
I realized quickly, once I stepped out of the “expectations of others to set lofty and unrealistic goals on January 1” that the secret answer was very, very simple and it has since revolutionized my life, and the lives of countless others. The secret is to not make evaluating your life, setting goals, or charting your course for the future a one time a year event, but instead to make it part of who you are every day. With this, I stopped making new years resolutions and instead committed to a continuous process of resetting my life. It’s made all the difference. Instead of a list of huge goals once a year, I’m looking at where I am continually and consciously and intentionally making choices in my thoughts, attitudes, and actions to move me closer to living my life purpose and passion.
When I started, there were some big changes I had to make in my life…things that if I continued, I would be in really, really bad shape. These radical resets needed plans to change, habits to be broken, and a new life direction created. You may have some areas of your life where you need a radical reset.
You need to break off a toxic relationship…
You need to break the chains of a drug or alcohol addiction…
You need to make a job change because where you are in killing you…
You need to make a huge change in how you view, handle, and manage your money…
You need to recommit to your faith…
You need to go back and finish your education…
What else is on your list?
Once I was able to move through the “big rocks”, I was then able to make realigning and refining resets, those smaller adjustments on a consistent basis to help stay on track and on target, a focus of my life. Now, each morning I take a few minutes to ponder what I’ll be doing that day and how that aligns with my life mission, purpose, and goals. At the end of each day, I take a few minutes to reflect on the day by answering the questions: What worked well? What didn’t work well? What could I have done different and what WILL I do different in the future? Did I live each moment with intentionality and focus on my life purpose? This change has made all the difference for me. No longer is life visioning a “moment in time event”, but instead it’s just part of who I am …every minute of every day.
If you’re saying, “That sounds great, but there’s no way I could ever do that”, and if you truly believe you won’t be able to make this change – you’re probably right. But, if you believe this is a better way and you would be willing to try, I promise you’ll be amazed with change it makes for your life and the results you’ll achieve. In reality, whether you believe you can’t or you can, you’re right. It takes discipline, commitment to live a life different than everyone else, and motivation for change, but with your daily decision to live a life of RESET, you’ll look in the rearview mirror in a relatively short time and be amazed at what you’ve accomplished and even more importantly…what you’ve become.
So, with the new years resolution monster out of my life, I’m able to make immediate and intentional choices, each and every day, to move forward with the changes I need to make to create the legacy I want to leave.
Now, don't get me wrong...I love commitment to life change. It's my purpose to help bring hope, healing and inspiration to everyone I meet and lead on the journey for change growth and success. So, obviously I'm not a downer on helping people create better lives for themselves. It's just that for the vast majority of people, New Years resolutions don't work and actually lead to guilt, shame, regret, and feelings of failure. I care so much about you and want the absolute best for you, your life, your health, your relationships, your faith, your personal-growth, your job, your finances...EVERYTHING!! That's why I just had to share that RESET has absolutely revolutionized my life…and my prayer for 2015 is that your life will also be radically changed and you’ll start today to take a different path and make the rest of your life the best of your life.
Live your life of purpose with passion!
Dr. Jason