The Most Radical Thing a Leader Can Do. Forgive

I want to tell you about a leader I know.

Sharp. Gifted. The kind of person who walks into a room and people just... pay attention. Built a strong team. Had real vision. Genuinely cared about the people he led.

But a few years back, one of his closest team members betrayed his trust. Took credit for work that wasn't his. Undermined him privately while smiling to his face. And when it all came out, it was ugly.

He handled it professionally. Said the right things. Moved the person off the team. But something changed in him after that.

He got tighter. More guarded. Started holding people at arm's length. His one-on-ones got shorter. His trust got smaller. He still showed up. He still performed. But the warmth that made him magnetic as a leader? It slowly went quiet.

What happened to him?

He never forgave. He thought he had. He told himself he had moved on. But he was still wearing the weight of that offense every single day. It was shaping how he led. How he trusted. How he loved the people on his team.

And here's the thing. None of them had even done anything wrong. That's what unforgiveness does. It's quiet. It's sneaky. And it costs you far more than the person who hurt you ever could.

Forgiveness in leadership is one of the most radical, and most necessary, things a leader can practice. And I think we underestimate it because we've confused forgiveness with weakness. We think forgiving means excusing. Forgetting. Letting someone off the hook.

But that's not it at all. Forgiveness is release. It's like shrugging off a heavy coat you forgot you were even wearing. You didn't realize how much you were carrying until you finally put it down. And then you take a breath. A real one.

And something in you goes, oh. That's what light feels like. It's freedom. Not just from the person who hurt you. From the offense itself.

Here's what I've seen in my own leadership journey. When I've held onto offense, I've led smaller. Not weaker in terms of results, maybe. But smaller in terms of presence. In terms of openness. In terms of the kind of love that actually changes people. Because you can't lead with a full heart and a clenched fist at the same time.

Unforgiveness is a clenched fist. It looks strong from the outside. But inside it's just fear. Fear of being hurt again. Fear of looking foolish. Fear of what it means to let something go that felt so significant.

And leaders who lead from that place? They might build something. But they won't build something great. Not really. Because great cultures aren't built on performance and pressure. They're built on trust. And trust requires an open hand, not a closed one.

Now I want to be honest with you here because I think this is where it gets hard. Some of you are carrying something real. It wasn't a minor misunderstanding. It was a real betrayal. A real wound. Someone you trusted, someone you invested in, someone you believed in, they hurt you in a way that left a mark.

I'm not going to minimize that. But I want to ask you something. How long are you going to let that moment keep leading your team? Because every time you hold a new person at arm's length because of what an old person did, the old person is still in the room. Still influencing your culture. Still shaping your leadership. They probably don't even think about it anymore. But you're still paying the price.

That's not justice. That's a prison.

And the wild thing is, you locked it from the inside.

Forgiveness is how you walk out. And here's what I've found. The moment you actually release it, something shifts. Space opens up. Your leadership gets lighter. Your presence gets warmer. Your capacity to trust, to invest, to love the people in front of you, it all comes back.

You stop punishing your current team for your past wounds.

You stop leading from the scar.

You lead from the healing.

And that is fierce. That is love. That is the kind of leadership that doesn't just build teams. It transforms them.

This is also one of the most personal things I can say. Because forgiveness in leadership doesn't just apply to what happens in the office.

It applies to the version of yourself you've been hardest on.

The decisions you've replayed too many times.

The seasons you led poorly.

The moments you wish you could take back.

Forgive yourself too.

You are not the worst thing you've done. You are not the worst season you've walked through. You are not the leader you were on your hardest day.

You're becoming. And that process is allowed to include some hard chapters.

Here's what I want you to sit with this week.

Who are you still holding in a clenched fist? Not because it's helping you. But because letting go feels like losing something. Feels like they win. But here's the truth. Forgiveness doesn't mean they win. It means you get free. And free leaders build free cultures. Where people can breathe. Where people can fail and come back. Where love is the thing that holds it all together.

That's LOVE Fierce leadership. And forgiveness is right at the heart of it.

Put the coat down. Take a real breath.

And lead free.

Live and lead in LOVE!

Dr. Jason